Rusty Redenbacher Risin'

Big ballin in #Naptown with muh dude, Jett!

RR

#MyDogTheCandyThief #RustyWrites

First picture: “Awww…! Look at that face! Whatta sweetheart!”

Yeah, right. I can hear y’all now. That’s how he gets over. That’s how he tricks ya. Don’t be fooled, my people. That is the face of a THIEF. 

I got a text from Muhbabay asking if I ate the whole Snickers bar I had last night….and that my dog’s life depended on it. I knew what was happening, man. 

Look at the second picture. I don’t know who to be mad at first; Jett for eating half a damn Snickers bar or Muhbabay for thinking that I would use my teeth to open a candy-bar wrapper. SMH. My dog is a savage, man. Look at that carnage. There was nothing for me discover but this debris. This dude, man…

I guess it wasn’t enough for him to be eating these healthy snacks we got for him. Naw. We make sure he has snacks of his own on the regular, decent ones too, yo. Muhbaby got the chump some hella decent snacks last go-round, and they’re good for his stank breath and teeth too. We switch em up. On the ‘junk-food’ side of things, he gets Milk-Bones and I haven’t eaten a complete order of french-fries in YEARS, man. (He gets the crunchy, burnt ones. If the order is cold when I get it, which happens a lot at fast-food joints, he REALLY wins. Jett stays winning…)

…until you see the third picture. He wasn’t counting on us going to the store. Probably figured we’d just ride out the treats that he has now. Sure, they’re all ‘good for dog’s teeth’ and stuff, but I get the feeling he was ready for the junk again. He’s not quick to jump off into some IAMS and Breath-Busters like he is some danggone Milk-Bones. Savage. Of course, we love this idiot, so we bought his treats we know he digs…EVEN THOUGH HE SHOULDN’T BE GETTING NO DANG ‘GOOD TREATS’ BECAUSE HE JUST ATE MY DANG SNICKERS BAR.

(we had a coupon. smh)

Fourth picture: “Oh yeah, you see em, don’t ya, pal..? You hear em, don’t ya? You know that sound, don’t ya? That’s so cute how you run in here and chill when you hear that magical sound of biscuits in the box. Gotta be music to your ears! Now, talk to me about this afternoon’s snack you helped yourself to..the one on the coffee table? ‘Member that? Oh, I do. I’m gonna hafta watch your chocolate-thieving, wrapper leaving ass all night to make sure you’re gonna be okay because of that ‘dogs can’t eat chocolate’ thing…even though you’ve done this before, you clown. You didn’t even hide the wrapper this time. That was a nice touch tho…and the time you pooped in my shoe bag so I wouldn’t find it…these are precious memories…OH…back to what we were talking about, yeah…I don’t think you should have one of these treats yet, because you’ve already had half a Snickers bar, so I’m gonna just go ahead and feed you your dinner. Yeah, what ya think of that?”

Fifth picture: “*eats Milk-Bone*…and NOW, we’re even.”

RR

(P.S. - I wouldn’t have done Jett like that, y’all…but he was bold enough to TWEET about it. That’s just rude. If you wanna check his timeline out and follow my dog on Twitter, here’s his page. He be tweetin sometimes.

Jett on Twitter.)

It’s so true. 

#SWAG JETT OUT. 

RR

My awesome dog, Jett, as ‘Bark Kent’. He gotta alter-ego, y’all. 

#SWAGHOUND! #BASEDSCHNAUZER!

That damn dog has been playing on my laptop again…smh.